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piratedollie

Maebi
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I have been surprisingly silent since August.  I am in college now, full time school, learning so much, but not doing anything I feel is worth anything.  Photography is becoming just my dream state it seems, I don't have the time for it and when I do, all my plans don't work because no one here will be in the pictures, so I'm left just sitting in the leaves with my camera and me, we just talk, that have so much to say, but no way to speak.  I think I will try and leave here next year, a different school, one that actually will let me work in photography, because this one doesn't believe it is one of the fundamental art forms, which is something I strongly disagree on.  

If its anything, I have been living the college girl life, I spend Wednesdays and Fridays out on the town, and I spend the rest of my time on school work, I strive for unreachable goals still, so I just spend all my time hating what I do, its an oxymoron of a lifestyle.

You were right, Johnny and The Moon is such a magnificent sound! Oleanna is particularly good night now.

I have so many ideas, I hope someone will one day make them try using their skills, mine seem to be dissipating, I need someone to actually help me, not just give me another drink.  lonely somedays, cuddle anyone?
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Say something

3 min read


I am afraid to fail. Or even create anything less than what Ive been told I am so good at. But I suppose, many of us are. Its this fear that has now got me in a paralyzed state, which would explain my lack of any new work. It is also the frustration of feeling glued to the floor. I am so ready to try and do some good for the world. I have been silently watching the world we have now begin to hit its breaking point, and I want so bad to do something about it. I am fully aware of the plastic in the oceans, and I try and be aware of what I throw away, I recycle as much as I can, but its the fact that so much plastic is being produced that I feel like nothing I do will matter. I want to be able to go to the source, the companies using plastic and help them find ways to produce their products in a way that will not kill the oceans. I want to be able to somehow bring attention to these problems that all of us are creating, without even knowing it. I just don't know how to.
I start college in one week, and I feel already, that it will be yet another place where I become stuck and frustrated. I just cant figure out how to feel, or what to do about what I feel is about to become something that keeps me held down for another few years.
I hope to create soon, hopefully it will mean something.



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An Art Show

4 min read


I will be in an art show in 2 days. I have been getting ready for it for weeks now, its been next to extraordinarily unpleasant. I was chosen with 4 other students from my school to participate in it, it is the 10th year so they wanted something special. It will be extremely fascinating to be around such magical artists, and nerve wrecking also. I am not a nature photographer, like almost everyone else there, so it will either be a fantastic experience or it will leave me in a bruised state with my excitement crushed and a load of money gone. Which will it be? we will find out soon enough.

I hope to get to do photo again after this, I miss it, and doing this show has not let me do an art, ironic? I do believe so.


If it at all matters, i noticed today as i hugged the worn wood of the house deck that our yard is the greenest on the street. We do not water it, nor even plant anything in it. If I had my say we wouldn't even mow it, i like letting it grow wild. everyone else makes such a fuss about their yard, and somehow we have the most vivid shade of green Ive seen in this cold county in a long while.


How is your world today?


:thumb92430398: :thumb92408986: :thumb84638300:

:thumb90703764: Istanbul ::1 by MisterKey :thumb55053807:

ucansupurge by sadidas pas plus,deux sens by DelilahWoolf Quiero ser Santa by Kaotika



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Superman

5 min read

Hello from California, I'm on vacation here for a few more days. We have gone to Magic Mountain 3 days in a row now, the staff is starting to recognize us, hehe. I haven't gotten to come for 3 years, since the DA Summit, so I've missed it a lot. Plus I've been riding roller coasters since before I was tall enough. Superman the ride is uber fun, I can't even imagine how many times i've rode it in my life. Something about getting to see the world sideways and have that moment of no gravity is a thrill. Plus I want to try and reach the superman at the top, one day, one day. Anyway, rode lots of stuff. I have a fun photo coming soon.

Here is an artist who tickles my fancy right now:
:iconralphniese:

condorman by RalphNiese candyelephant and schoolgirl by RalphNiese beachblanket 64 by RalphNiese

Messi Journey to the Stars I by RalphNiese Milano Super Bunny by RalphNiese Messi Journey to the Stars II by RalphNiese

And some lovely Thumbs for you to enjoy:
Freedom of mind by ElenaOprea :thumb86610790: :thumb84644603:

:thumb85148121: :thumb86356517: :thumb84038050:

:thumb87551989:



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Okay okay okay.
I have got to stop trying to just make pictures that people will like, I'm going back to why I came to this place of growth and care. I'm going to experiment again, take pictures of anything I want again, Its time to just do art because I enjoy it. I have stopped just taking pictures and waiting to see if they are liked, I take them with the idea that they have to be liked, no more of that! Its art time!

Freedom of mind by ElenaOprea :thumb86610790: :thumb84644603:

:thumb85148121: :thumb86356517: :thumb84038050:



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since youve been gone by piratedollie, journal

Say something by piratedollie, journal

An Art Show by piratedollie, journal

Superman by piratedollie, journal

Devious Journal Entry by piratedollie, journal